Dating woes can make you want to stay single forever, but you don’t have to. Find out why dating is difficult, some dating red flags, and what to do about difficulties that arise in dating.
You are surrounded by couples who have it all together, and together they have it all. Then there’s you. Single. When was your last date? Was it fun or was it horrible? One bad date can make you want to avoid attractive people entirely and stay out of the dating game forever. Why do bad dates keep happening to you? Join SpiritualBlossom to learn about dating woes and why they happen. Learn some common dating red flags and what to do about them. Find out if it’s you or your date causing the problems. Dating can be hell on earth sometimes, but it doesn’t have to be. Read on to find out about what to do when dating problems happen to you.
Why Do We Date?
Dating helps us get to know people who we might have a long-term romantic relationship with. You get to know someone who has the potential to become a partner. If it doesn't work out that's ok. Unfortunately, we unintentionally complicate something that should be quite simple. Nobody means to. It happens because we get excited about the possibility of new love and then we're disappointed when things don’t work out. Sometimes people fight too hard to continue dating when they see that things are not working because they genuinely like the person and they want to try their best to work things out.
Some people hold on because they're afraid of being single. Other people hold on because they want to be in complete control of somebody else. Some people do it for social status because all their friends are in relationships and they don't want to be embarrassed by not being the same. Dating can go wrong for a number of reasons. Sometimes you're poorly matched with someone and you don't realize it at first. Other times people pretend to be different than the way that they actually are. Time reveals our true colors. A lot of people are on their best behavior when they first start dating you, and then they start showing their bad side as they become more comfortable with you. Some people make the mistake of going into dating with unrealistic expectations. It can all be terribly disappointing. Learn how to deal with disappointments here: Facing Disappointment-Coping with Life’s Letdowns
Common Dating Red Flags
The list of red flags that can stand out when you're on a date with somebody is endless. Some very common ones are them not showing up or showing up late. Sometimes they flirt with other people while they're on a date with you or they criticize you. Read on to find out about ten common dating red flags and what to do about them.
They Flake Out
It is understandable for someone to have to reschedule, but when they reschedule multiple times, especially for the same date, chances are they are not going to get together with you. If they fail to show up, especially if they don’t call to explain themselves, that's an even worse sign. If they seem like they're genuinely telling the truth about having to reschedule, it's only fair to let them. If they seem like they're just being irresponsible and are not focused on getting together with you, then forget about them. Date somebody else.
They’re Always Late
Some people just never seem to be able to show up on time. This can be for different reasons. Some people have an inability to consider how long it takes to get places. Being in crowded places can hold some people up. Others just have that sort of personality. When you are trying to date them, you are going to have to decide whether to tolerate it or not. Some people take chronic lateness as the late person being inconsiderate of their time, and therefore not serious about a relationship. Read all about how to manage your time well and be on time here: Happy Singles - Is Being Single Better?
They Flirt with Other People
Have you ever been on a date with someone who started to flirt with somebody else? If it's a first date and they run into an old flame, maybe it's a sign that they need to get back together. However, no matter why they flirt with someone else, it's an indicator that they're really not interested in you. If you've been dating someone for a while and they have what's called the “roving eye”, don't expect them to be faithful. Sure, everybody sees other attractive people, but that doesn't mean that we should act like it. If your date isn't focused on you, you don't have to continue dating them.
They Never Call You
Communications are established early in new dating relationships. If you're dating someone who will talk to you anytime you call them, but they never call you, you're basically dating someone who wants you to chase them and pursue them. Some people call this a dating game and some want to play instead of having a true relationship. Some people like that. If you don't like it, but you like the person who you're dating, talk it over with them and see if they'll start calling you sometimes too. Find more love advice here: The Best Advice for Love
Delayed Responses
We all get busy, but when you're dating someone and they go a long time without responding to you, unless there's a terrible emergency, it means they're not interested. If you like someone enough to bother to reach out to them, give them a chance to respond. If days, weeks, or even months go by and you don't hear anything, you can just date someone else.
It’s All About Them
Perhaps one of the strongest indicators that you're dating the wrong person is that they give you signs that they care only about themselves. They might expect you to spend more money on them than they know you can afford. If they don't care about the time that you need to rest, work, and spend time with family, you don't have to date them. If they want different things out of the relationship than you do, and they expect you to sacrifice and give them only what they want, you don't have to date them. You might feel better off single than with someone selfish and you can read all about that here: Happy Singles - Is Being Single Better?
They Criticize You
Being criticized by your date is not only embarrassing, but it can make you uncomfortable with them. A date isn't really the time for constructive criticism to try and help someone to better themselves. It's time for you to get to know someone and find out whether you want them in your life long-term or not. So, if someone who you are newly dating starts criticizing you, you can use reverse psychology and criticize them back until they shut up, or you can break things off.
They Complain About Their Ex
All of us have at least one ex who was a horrible person that we could have done without ever meeting. That's got nothing to do with your date. If you show up for a date, especially the first date, and they are complaining about their ex, some people take that as an immediate turn off. Some people take it as a sign that they're not over their relationship and they're not ready to move on yet. Some people will even tell you certain things that their ex did that they want to make sure you don't do, and you can always just get up and leave. What can you do if you have dreams about an ex? Find out here: Why Do I Dream About My Ex?
They Come on Too Strong
It's always nice to find someone who thinks you're attractive, but when someone who you barely know expects an immediate commitment, it might scare you off for good. Some people are so eager for a relationship, they would settle down with the first person they could even before they know them. If somebody is trying to move things along too quickly, you could always tell them to slow down. Sometimes they do. Maybe they like you that much, or maybe they're just weird. You decide.
They Catfished You
Catfishing means someone presents an artificial identity of themselves. Some people use glamour apps to make themselves look entirely different. Other people use photographs from many years ago because they're afraid that people think they're too old to be attractive. When someone has lied to you about the way that they are, it's a very bad idea to pursue a relationship with them. Dishonesty is not good in a relationship. Find out how to catch a liar in the act here: You Liar! How Do You Catch a Liar?
Is It Me or Them?
If you keep having bad dates, you might wonder if it's your fault. Sometimes it is. Sometimes it's not. Read on to find out a few ways to tell if you are the one to blame for the bad relationships or if it's someone else.
When It’s You
We have to be very fair and objective about the way that we are. If your relationships go exactly the same way every time, you're stuck in a cycle and it's you. If you're someone who believes that you can never make a mistake, nobody is going to tolerate that. If you compare your dates to your exes, you need to stop.
It’s the Same Thing Every Time
Do you always date someone who cheats? Do you always date someone who takes advantage of you? Do you always date someone who withholds sex? Instead of saying, "People are ALL the same!!!” admit that you are stuck in a toxic cycle. Something draws you to the same type of situation time and again, and no matter how many people you leave you always find yourself in the same situation. Reach out to a psychic or a relationship counselor to help you make better decisions.
You’re “Never Wrong”
Are you one of those people who believes you are perfect? Congratulations, you are the problem in your relationships. It is impossible for one person to always be right. You are going to make plenty of mistakes in your life, and being unable to admit that shows that you care more about your ego than the person who you're supposed to be dating. Don't be surprised if they leave you.
You Do Comparisons
If you start comparing your dates to every other date you've ever had, and you tell them about it, be aware that this is a major turn off and it's probably going to scare people off. You might see similarities between people who you date, but they're not the same person. Don't hold your date accountable for what other people did.
When It’s Them
It's not always your fault that things went badly though. When something goes horribly and nothing like this has happened to you before, it's probably the other person's fault. If you've been in meaningful relationships before but this person hasn't, they're probably the cause of the problems. Some people just like to pick fights and have fun with it, if they do that pretty much any conflict is going to be their fault.
This Hasn’t Happened Before
If you date someone whose behavior is so horrible, you don't even want to be in the same city with them ever again, has it ever happened before? If it hasn't, it's them. Just because somebody shows up for a date with you doesn't mean you're automatically going to like them, even if it seemed like you had a lot in common. Be honest with yourself and step away.
They Are Chronically Single
Some people are not cut out for long-term relationships and that's ok. It seems like those people are dying for a relationship though, doesn't it? They go from failed relationship to failed relationship and quite often blame other people. If they have never been able to make a relationship succeed, it's them. You can walk away.
They Love Drama
Some people get bored in life very easily and need to always have some kind of a fight going. Do you want to date someone who behaves that way? If they always seem to be having an argument with someone, or are constantly in the middle of some major mess that is life shattering, they either create those situations or they are naturally drawn to them. They are the reason why their relationships don't work out. Leave if you want to.
What to Do About Bad Dates
A bad date can happen to anybody. If the person you meet for a date repels you, don’t feel bad. It could happen to anybody. Just admit that you don’t like them. If there is a slight problem, maybe it can be discussed and corrected. Some couples meet, have a small rough patch, and then get through it to have a lifetime of love together. Be fair to yourself and accept your true feelings about someone. Dating can help you find true love, even if it can be disastrous sometimes.
Dating is supposed to be about getting to know someone who is your dream come true, but sometimes it turns into a nightmare. When they are chronically late, or they complain about their ex, it can make you want to give up dating and stay single for life. If you are the one making dates difficult, adjust your behavior and you can move forward into a great relationship. When a bad date happens, you can either try again with your date or step away to find someone else. The perfect person is just waiting to love you. Don’t let a bad date keep you from finding them.
Would you like to know what the future holds for you and your love life? Reach out to one of our psychics to find out.
About the Author: Lady Saoirse has studied magic and lore for most of her life but started walking her own Magical Path after being spiritually reborn in the desert. Today she is a High Priestess for The Temple of the Goddess, she is a psychic advisor and spiritual counselor, she shares her gifts as a Psychic and Content Writer for Mysticsense and SpiritualBlossom, and she writes for The Green Egg Magazine and PaganPages.Org emag.
