When Can I Tell Him I Love Him?
November 14, 2023 10 min read

When Can I Tell Him I Love Him?

By Lady Saoirse

TL;DR- “When should I tell my boyfriend I love him?” is a question as old as time itself.  Some people worry they should not reveal their feelings too soon, out of fear they will scare the person who they love off, while other people want to literally declare undying love on a first date. When is the right time to tell someone that you love them? Find out today!


When you know you love him, you want to do all you can to keep your boyfriend happy and in your life. Maybe you don’t know when the time is right to tell him just how much you love him, though. You may have heard horror stories from friends whose significant other dumped them because they did not want to feel rushed into commitment. Maybe you come from a family where people don’t tell each other “I love you” and you aren’t sure how the man you love will react if you tell him that you do. Plenty of couples stay together happily without telling one another they love each other, but plenty of other people feel the need to talk about their feelings and telling the people who they love “I love you” is part of how they show that love.

Where is your love headed when you ask, “When can I tell him I love him?” Is the doubt anxiety, or is it because you can tell he doesn’t love you too? Is there any such thing as saying “I love you” too soon, and is it safer waiting for someone you love to say it to you before you say it to them? Is it even necessary to tell people you love them when you have a strong mental and love connection that automatically allows you both to know how one another feels? How can you tell if love is real anyways? Join us as we learn all about saying “I love you”.



When A Guy Falls in Love

When Can I Tell Him I Love Him?

“ But if he loves you he will profess it, he will provide for you, and he will protect you.” – Steve Harvey

This is one of many ‘when he loves you’ quotes, and the saying is very simple, but it’s also true. When a man or a woman loves you, not only will they act like it, but they will also say it. Not everybody is good at expressing their feelings, and some will have an easier time saying “I love you” than others will, but one thing is certain; Their words in general will be loving ones. They will say your name lovingly and will say kind words to you. They will reach out to talk to you when you are not together, and they will call or come visit you to make plans with you.

When somebody loves you, them saying, “I love you” may take the form of them taking up for you in your absence, and they will brag about how great you are to family and friends. If, instead, they forbid you to tell anybody you are seeing each other, that’s not love. When he realizes he loves you, his words will reflect his love, and the longer he loves you, the more loving things he will say. Simply saying “I love you” won’t be all he says to express his love. What he doesn’t say will also express that.

He won’t deliberately say things to hurt you if he loves you. He won’t nag you or make empty promises if he loves you. He will be honest with you if he loves you and he will choose his words wisely if he disagrees or is upset. He will not withhold things you deserve to know, and he will not speak unreasonable demands to you. A man in love cares about what he says to the person he loves and will show that in his words.


When He Says, “I Love You” Too Soon

When Can I Tell Him I Love Him?

“The trouble is you think you have time.” - Buddha

“ I don’t know when to tell him I love him. It might be too soon!” Is it? Love is love. Infatuation or a fast crush is in no way love. True love, however, has been said to happen the moment we meet people sometimes. There are reasons this could be. Perhaps we have found a past life love and seeing them for the first time in this incarnation, all the love rushes back to us. Perhaps we are meant to be with someone, and we know this the first time we meet them.  Another possibility is that we immediately recognize a soulmate the moment we meet them, and the love is present.

True love can be instant, and if this is someone who you are meant to be with, chances are they will feel it immediately also. A famous story is of actor Michael Douglas and wife Catherine Zeta-Jones from People magazine. They shared,

“ The actor knew from the moment he laid eyes on Zeta-Jones that she was the one, and had an interesting way of breaking the news to her.

"I looked at her, and I said, 'Catherine, I'm going to be the father of your children,' " Douglas said, according to The Hollywood Reporter. "The first time I met her! You think that went over big?"

Apparently, the over-the-top comment didn't scare her away because the two have been married for 20 years and share two children: son Dylan and daughter Carys.”


Nineteen more beautiful and inspiring love at first sign stories are shared in this article that you can read here: Celebrity Couples Who Fell in Love at First Sight (people.com)


Waiting For Them to Say it First

When Can I Tell Him I Love Him?

“ I loved you from the very first day.” – Love thispic.com

“I would tell him I love him, but I want him to say it first!” Some people feel that it is embarrassing to be the first to state love in a relationship, but truthfully, being in love is not about who does what first. When you are in love, being in love, and sharing life in general with the person you love is the most important thing, not who can brag that they are cherished most as evidenced by the fact the other person said “I love you” first. One of the top regrets people have reported in love relationships is actually not telling someone they loved them. Sometimes this results in no relationship occurring at all, and people feel they lost a chance to share love with somebody they could have if only they had told them that they loved them. Never take a risk of losing somebody, but instead tell them how you feel!

Telepathic Love Connection

When Can I Tell Him I Love Him?

“ My love for her is beyond any love I have ever described. It is a love that is beyond love; a soul connection in which no seam is visible.” – Steve Maraboli

Telepathy between lovers means it might not be completely necessary to tell him you love him, but he will appreciate hearing it anyway. When your hearts and souls are connected, you may know what is on one another’s minds and in each other’s hearts already. Not all couples do a lot of love talk, but they express love in many ways. Telling somebody you love them can happen in a lot more ways than specifically using the words, “I love you”.

You can do little things to let them know you are thinking of them, like surprising them with their favorite magazine, or dropping in for lunch with them. You can go places they enjoy with them although those are not specifically places you would choose to go, and you can let them sleep in after they had an especially trying week at work. You can make them top priority in your life, and you can even get used to the fact they have cats when you specifically never really liked cats all that much. There are unlimited ways to show somebody you love them by taking their needs and desires into account and making sure they know you care. Saying the words, “I love you” is just one way to do that.


What’s The Worst That Can Happen?

When Can I Tell Him I Love Him?

One woman fell in love with a man who did not love her. She had not spoken the words, “I love you” yet, but she was close to doing so. Her actions, however, expressed her love. She made it a point to spend time with him, and she even sent him a gift, which he never acknowledged. He told her “ I’ve been BUSY” with a heavy emphasis on the word busy, but she had been busy too. She was working full time and finishing her musical studies as well as earning a professional certification to move up in her career.  Afterwards, he reached out when he wanted sex, but that was it.

She had expressed love and he had expressed that he didn’t care. So, she did the unthinkable. She moved on with her life without him.  She married, and shared love with her husband and many friends, none of whom took her love for granted. She told her husband and friends that she loved them, and she did it all the time. They told her they loved her too.

The worst thing that can happen when you tell somebody you love them is they will not appreciate it. Like the woman’s ex-lover, they may string you along for dates or sex, or so they don’t feel lonely, but the good part is, when you express your love to them, their reaction will immediately tell you if they love you too.  Don’t worry about losing people who don’t love you. Like the woman in the story, you will have a long life with great love ahead of you even if the person you currently love doesn’t also love you. 


When Love is Real

When Can I Tell Him I Love Him?

“ Don’t be afraid to lose the person you love; because if he or she truly loves you, they are not going anywhere.” – loveandsayings.com

When Love is real, it finds a way to express itself to you. Maybe it’s something as simple as your new romance interest remembering your birthday the first year you are dating. Maybe it’s something as complicated as them getting a friend to “go try on rings for fun” with you so they can get your ring size and surprise you with an engagement ring when they ask you to marry them. One thing is for sure, though: when he is in love with you, he will make sure you know it. Early on in relationships, you won’t always know for sure where things are going, but over time, love and intentions to stick around are expressed in a lot of different ways, and when you love him and he loves you, there will be no doubt about your feelings for one another. So don’t ever worry that when you tell him you love him it will “scare him off” because only a man who doesn’t love you at all will react unfavorably when you love him so much that you tell him.

When this happens, and somebody disappears from your life simply because they were repelled by the fact you said you love them, this is no event to grieve. They will have done you a favor by excusing themselves so you can focus all the love you have to give on people who will truly appreciate you. Saying “I love you” truly is one of the best ways to tell your boyfriend you love him. If he’s the one, he will say, “I love you too!”

Where there is love, there is no fear.  When you know you love him, tell him whenever you want to. Life is short, and things can change before you know it. True love is not something that will scare off someone who loves you. Tell the people who you love that you love them and tell them often. After all, sometimes, love is all we have, and it is what matters most. Be the love, share the love, and embrace the love!


Do you have questions about relationships? If you’re waiting for your lover and want to know about the future or find out ways to show your boyfriend you love him, you can reach out to one of hundreds of online psychic advisors with us any time. Online Psychic Readings | Spiritual Blossom


About the Author:  Lady Saoirse has studied magic and lore for most of her life but started walking her own Magical Path after being spiritually reborn in the desert. Today is a Priestess for the Temple of the Goddess. She shares her gifts as a Psychic and Content Writer for Spiritual Blossom and she writes for Pagan Pages emag.